Early Utah Days

I feel like all of my posts about our move were so negative. I tend to be that way...to focus on all of the things that I'm doing wrong rather than on any one thing that I'm doing right. I guess my mind often operates like this: don't focus on what you're doing right. Those things are already right and don't need changing. It's the things you aren't doing right that need changing, so focus on improving those areas and making them right. Truth be told, it all has to do with my desire to be perfect in all things. And I never will be perfect in all things nor do I need to be, but for some reason I hold myself to that impossible standard. Christ was perfect and I'm supposed to be Christ-like, right? Well, I'm not just talking about areas where I should strive to more like Christ. Areas like patience, kindness, self-control, denying self, loving others, etc. Those are areas where I should strive to be more like Him. I'm talking about being satisfied with who He made me to be and not trying to be someone He didn't intend for me to be. Here's an example: Allison's birthday is coming up. I love baking cakes for my family on their birthdays. It's a way of expressing my love for them. I'm not gifted in the area of cake decorating; however, I create expectations for myself that I will never be able to meet. I'm not going to turn out cakes like my friend who sells decorated cakes for a living, but somehow I hold myself to that impossible standard and expect that I should do it. Ridiculous, right?! Then, when I make the cake, I spend so much time worrying about all of the imperfections that I don't even enjoy the finished product. And then I think that other people think the cake isn't that great and that either they could have done a better job or I should have let a professional do it. Isn't that silly? So in preparation for Allison's birthday, I'm trying to focus on baking and decorating her cake out of love for her and not on making a perfectly decorated cake. I want to have fun with it. Jackson's excited to help me too, which makes it even better and way more special. (If my older sister read this post, she would tell me to give myself another year or two and then I'll be turning to the professionals because I won't have time to worry about making my kids their own cakes and the professionally baked cake will taste great, require a lot less effort, and be just as loved by my kids!)

Now, back to the real reason for this post...our early Utah days. As we've been going through all of this transition and enjoying our new home state, there is a song that has really ministered to me. It's been perfect, in fact. A girl at our church in Alabama sang it right before we moved. I had never heard it before and I remember writing down some of the lyrics in my sermon notebook. Then, I heard it again on KSBJ in Houston. After that, I bought it from iTunes. Have you ever heard Blessings by Laura Story? If you haven't, go online and listen to it now. It's amazing. Here are the lyrics (and I've italicized the parts that especially spoke to me during this time).

We pray for blessings, we pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering

All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops?
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?
What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough

And all the while You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?
And what if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us, when darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can’t satisfy?

And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?

Every time I hear that song, I'm reminded of God's love. I'm reminded not to focus on all of the little things that don't go the way that I think they should go because His plan is perfect and He loves "us way too much to give us lesser things." His hand in my life has shown me many times that I really don't want things to go the way I had planned because His plan is SO much better!

So in the midst of the hardships of moving, I really have tried to trust in His sovereignty and to enjoy all of the blessings He has given me...like this trail that sits right next to our lodging facility and enables me to get some much needed exercise with my family. Isn't the view breathtaking?

And right down the street from where we are staying, there is an awesome splash pad and playground for the kids with the mountain range in the backdrop.

We've taken the kids here a few times since we've been in Utah, but this was our first trip. The water was cold, but they had fun. Jason walked around with Allison to build up her courage.

As time went by, she got more and more courageous:

I love her happy face!

And more and more excited!

Jackson wasn't going to get wet at first, but once he saw all of the fun everyone else was having, he decided to let himself go.

He really enjoyed putting his feet over the holes to stop the water from shooting out and making the water from the other holes shoot higher.

His goal was to jump off the hole without letting the water shoot all over him.

Jason was really good at it, of course, so Jackson kept trying and trying. "How does Daddy not get wet when he takes his foot off?"

After they'd had enough of the water, they ventured to the playground. Miss Independent wanted to swing all by herself, but Jackson really wanted to push her. She was not happy about Jackson pushing her.

And Jackson wasn't happy when Jason made him stop, but she certainly was!

We got Jackson to enjoy his own swing...

while Alli had the pleasure of hers.

The first two weeks we were here, we spent our days looking at houses. We found a few that we really liked but not one that we felt had everything we were looking for. Since we are hoping to be here for several years, we were trying to take our time and find a place that fit our needs well. (We always keep our minds open to the fact that God may ask us to move at any time, but we are hoping that we do get to stay here for the 3-5 years that we're expecting.) We narrowed down our choices to two homes and then finally made our decision, which is never easy for us. :-)) We can't move in until August 17th. I was hoping to get settled more quickly, but since the moving industry is so behind this summer, it really doesn't matter. Right now, we are hoping to have all of our stuff soon after we move in.

Looking back, I think we found a home really quickly. By July 4th, we knew where we were going to be living. That was a huge blessing because house-hunting is exhausting, especially for kids. We tried to make it as fun as possible. Here's a photo of Alli pretending to drive while Jason and Jackson were still looking at a house. For some reason, pretending to drive is so fascinating for children. It must be all of the buttons and switches that they can play with!

In this picture, she's showing the chunk of tongue that she bit through when she fell between the bench seat and table at "nothing but NOODLES" and slammed her chin on the table. Blood was everywhere!

When we visited Utah back in 2009, I would always take Jackson to Discovery Gateway Children's Museum. He always had so much fun, so I was really excited to take both of them. I learned very quickly that taking two kids is much different than taking one, especially when one of those kids loves to run away! Allison is very independent and totally fearless. When Jackson was her age, he wanted you near him at all times and if he lost sight of you for very long, he would scream for you. Not Allison! She could care less where I'm at. She's off on her own adventures and she never gives thought to the fact that she may not be able to find her way back to me (much less that someone might possibly take her). I felt so bad for Jackson because he wanted me to concentrate on playing with him, but I had to keep my eyes on Alli because she was out the door with her shopping cart several times.

The Garden fascinated both of them. It's a giant beehive full of things to do with balls. We collected balls in the bins and then they'd find an area to do interesting things with the balls. They made a great team.

Kids Eye View is a super fun place to be. They have a construction zone, a play house, dress-up clothes, a water play area, a market, a farm, a rock wall, and much more. Allison loved pushing the grocery cart around. (I actually found one just like it for her birthday...and for a lot less than they are usually priced. Score!)

Jackson was still fascinated with the red car that you can fill with gas with a real gas nozzle and air up the tires with a real-looking air pump. I think he looks so much like Jason in this photo. I love it!!

And because Jackson liked filling up the gas, Allison did too. She loves the things her big brother loves. One thing is for sure, she wouldn't be the same girl without having Jackson as her big brother. They are so much fun together!

The last time Jackson was here, he wouldn't have anything to do with the dress-up clothes. This time, it was one of the first things he wanted to do. This fireman's uniform was really nice. I'd love to find one just like it.

I don't know that Allison's into dress-up clothes yet, but she does love trying on outfit after outfit from her drawers at home. She can dress and undress herself, so she has a blast with all of her clothes. She can't stand anything itchy or gathered, so I'm not sure princess dresses will appeal to her just yet. We did find a postal worker uniform. It was missing buttons, but she was happy to have something that fit her. And do you see the salami she's holding? She got that out of the market and carried it around all day!

Back at the place we're staying, the kids have really used their imaginations. When they don't have billions of toys to play with, they are forced to be creative. I think I'm onto something here! The room we're staying in right now is designed for families with pets, so there are two pet porters in our room. I never realized how much fun they would have in those things! Allison loves to stash things in them and she enjoys sitting in the big one and playing with her toys. It's like her own little house! (And I threaten to lock them inside the cages if they don't behave! Just kidding! Well, I did tell them that one time, but I wasn't serious!) Here they are squeezing themselves inside of trashcans. This was Allison's idea for sure because she takes the liners out of the cans and uses them to collect toys, rocks, books, cooking utensils, blankies, almond milk!, etc. (She poured almost an entire quart of almond milk in the bathroom trashcan one time.) I now only use two of the trashcans and leave the rest of them empty so they can play with them.

We don't have a bathtub in our room, but we do have a huge kitchen sink, which I love. I give Allison her baths in the kitchen sink and she loves it.

We've been a one car family since January. It wasn't bad at all while we were in Alabama because Jason's school was so close to home and his schedule was easy for me to work around. Here, it's been much tougher because he has to be at work at 6 a.m. and I do not desire to get the kids out of the house at 5:45 in the morning if we need the van that day. Since we aren't in our house yet and we are living on base, it's been working out okay because his work is super close to where we are staying. It's within walking distance. In fact, I've walked a ton since we've been here because of only having one car and that's the part that I LOVE! I've always said that I could live in a big city and not own a car because I love walking everywhere and taking public transit. Our European days put that in me, no doubt.

One day that we were walking to Jason's work, we stumbled upon a tent sale at the commissary (base grocery store) and this Del Monte car was outside. The man had it set up with two racing games on the inside. The car steering wheels (there were two) and the gas and break pedals controlled the game. Jackson loved it!

They gave Jackson a hat before we left. He thought it was great. It is his racing hat, of course!

A couple of weeks ago, we went shopping around for kitchens for Alli's birthday. I wanted to see and feel some of the kitchens before purchasing online. Jackson was excited to wear his hat and they both packed their backpacks for the day. I love this picture of them.

It just so happened that Cutlers Cookies and Cupcakes was right next door to one of the children's boutiques. I'm a sucker for what I call "real" desserts. Not candy but desserts that are close to homemade like cupcakes, cakes, cookies, parfaits, etc. I know my Jackson loves cookies with sprinkles and my Alli loves "bake-bakes" - otherwise known as cupcakes. It took Jackson a long time to decide between a cookie or a cupcake, but he eventually went with his trusted favorite.

And Allison enjoyed her "bake-bake!" She didn't eat that much of it. She licked a lot of icing and ate some of the cake part, but then she was done. It was hard for her to eat, so I think I'll go with a cookie the next time.

While we were out, I did discover that Allison loves rocking horses. And a few days later when we came to this same store, she remembered the "horse" and went looking for it.

We've been here five weeks now and we're still finding new things to have fun with. Yesterday, we went on a walk to the post office. It can't be 1/2 of a mile from where we're staying, but it took us over an hour to get there. We had to stop and look at every rock on our way! Allison loves to collect rocks, so Jackson does now too. (He wouldn't be the same boy without his sissy either.) We filled a sippy cup with rocks and then got a plastic bag and filled it. Our walking adventure kept us out for three hours. I was hot and pooped when we got back!

Speaking of rock collecting, just outside of our room, there is an area for climbing and collecting rocks. One afternoon, Allison made a beeline for the small rocks and starting making herself a pile.

Meanwhile, Jackson climbed the large rocks. I wouldn't have any pictures from this day, but he requested that I take pictures with my phone. I'm so glad he did! He's become quite the smiler for the camera. It's fun!

He asked me to get him climbing the rock...

...and then jumping off. Ready! Set!

Go! (And no, I did not make him wear a helmet! He wears it all the time because it's his "racing" helmet!)

When they were done, Jackson offered to help Allison carry her rocks. Her answer? "No! Mommy!" He was so patient with her. He said in a sweet and high-pitched voice, "Allison, I'm not going to take your rocks. I just want to help you carry them and then I'll give them right back to you." She changed her mind and gladly let him carry her stash. I was proud of both of them. Jackson was patient and kind, and Allison reconsidered and made a good choice. While Alli was filling Jackson's shirt, he pointed out that she hadn't been nice to him at first. It was a good time to teach him that we won't always make the best choices at first, but what's important is that after we realize our original choices weren't good, we choose to go the right way. And when people wrong us but then repent and treat us nicely, we should praise God and be thankful rather than pointing out their wrong.

Two weeks from today, we'll have a second car (Jason found a great deal), and four days after that we'll get the keys to our house. I'm excited about both of those things, but what I'm really excited about is that our baby girl will be two in two days!!