18 Months with Jackson

Jackers,

Today, you are 18 months old. I can't believe how quickly the time has passed since I held you for the first time. To me, you are still a baby; but, I am often confronted with the reality that you are quickly turning into a little boy. Your daddy and I could not have known the love that we would have for you. It is more than we ever thought possible. Countless times a day, we look at you and marvel at the gift that God has given us. And Jackson, you are a gift, sent by God, for us love, nurture and discipline just as the Father does with us. It is a tremendous blessing to be your parents and to watch you grow and change into the person God designed you to be. As your mommy, I feel particularly blessed to spend (almost) every waking minute with you. I get to watch as the world unfolds itself to you and you see and learn things for the first time.

You have experienced so much in your short little life. Thanks to Daddy's job, you have lived in two countries (the USA and Germany). You've visited all of these places: in the USA: Dallas, Houston and Colorado Springs; in Germany: Trier, Aachen, Koln, Rothenburg o.d.t., Bernkastel, Wittlich, Bitburg, Rhine River, and many other small towns and villages; London; Prague; Rome; Amsterdam; beaches in Holland and Belgium; in Ireland: Dublin, Killarney, Tralee, Dingle Peninsula and the Cliffs of Moher; and Paris. You are quite the world traveler and you do it so well. You've been on so many different modes of transportation: car (both left and right-hand drive), airplane, train, bus, metro, boat, bicycle and ferry...and you definitely prefer the ones that do not require a car seat or seatbelt. (Since infancy, you have never been fond of being strapped down.)

You've never been much of an eater. In fact, I worried myself throughout months 10-13 because you weren't eating as much as most other kids your age. Your cousin Colin eats 3x as much as you do and he's a month younger. Just after your first birthday, you only weighed 19 pounds; but, once I talked to your grandma and learned that Daddy only weighed 19 pounds at his first birthday, I stopped worrying.

You love fruit. In fact, if reincarnation actually occurred, I am sure you would come back as a berry! You love strawberries, blueberries and raspberries. You love them so much, especially raspberries, that you will even eat them frozen! You can devour an entire carton of fresh blueberries or raspberries in less than 5 minutes. I actually have to hide them from you so that you'll eat other things. You also like apples, oranges, bananas, kiwi, pineapple, pears, grapes and peaches. I don't think there is a fruit that you don't like. You eat vegetables too, but not with the same enthusiasm. You like carrots, green peas (which you will also eat frozen!), sweet potatoes, red potatoes, butternut squash, pumpkin, bell peppers (red and orange), and you will eat onions, celery, mushrooms, green beans, and spinach when they are in things like soup. You like salmon, chicken, ground beef and poultry. You LOVE bread - the whole wheat bread that we make together at home. You'll eat eggs, but I wouldn't say that you love them. You don't particularly like cheese, but you will eat it melted on pizza or a grilled sandwich. Oh, and lately, you've really liked homemade salsa, guacamole, and applesauce.

Once you turned 17 months, you really became insistent on feeding yourself with a spoon and fork...so much so that you refuse to eat if you can't do it yourself. You are also fascinated with drinking from a glass, and I must say that you do all of the above quite well. I like to call you Mr. Eat 'n Run because sometimes that is the only way I can get you to eat - bite, run, bite, run, bite, run...

After your first birthday, I became more aggressive with using sign language to help you communicate. It's been amazing! Not only am I super impressed with how quickly you can learn a new sign, but I'm so grateful that you can speak with your hands words that your mouth is not yet able to pronounce. I feel so much better knowing that you can talk to me in a way that I can understand and meet your needs! Here is a list of signs (that I can currently think of) that you use almost every day: more, food, hot, cold, eat, drink, cup, water, please, all done, horse, cow, hat, shoes, socks, outside, airplane, keys, car/drive, hello, bye-bye, vacuum cleaner, ball, book, bath, brush your teeth, blankie, bed... Some of these signs you used after only seeing me sign them once. Amazing, my little man!

Although you sign a lot, you talk constantly!! You can say: Dadda, Mamma, PaPa, thank you, this, that, ball, hey, yes, no, uh-oh, up, down, phone, thank You Jesus, and many other unidentifiable words. Right now, your favorite word is 'this'. Everything is 'this'...as in "What's this? Can I have this? This is what I want. This needs your attention." You crack us up when you use it to tell us that your diaper is dirty. In fact, the first time you ever told me that your diaper needed changing, you pointed to your diaper and said, "This."

Speaking of diaper changes, you have gone through phases of hating to have your diaper changed to not caring at all. You recently left a hating phase (after a long and wonderful not caring phase) and are much more agreeable when being changed. I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts!

You have such a sweet voice. I love to hear you say Mamma and Dadda and thank You, Jesus. Dadda was your first word. You always said it loudly and with much enthusiasm. A couple of months ago, you started whispering Dadda. I think it's because I would whisper his name to you when we heard him coming through the front door at the end of each day...signaling to you to be quiet and listen for Daddy. You make us laugh when you say MammaDadda as one word. You speak Mamma slowly and drawn out and then you whisper Dadda very quickly. It's so funny! I've made an effort to say Dadda loudly and you've started saying it without whispering in the last week.

When you give us something, you say, "Thank you." When something falls, accidentally or purposefully, you say, "Uh-oh." If I am holding you and you want me to stand up, you say, "dup." as in stanD UP.

There are a lot of animals in our village: horses, cows, sheep, chickens, goats, cats and dogs. You know the sign for horse and cow. You can make the sounds of a cow, dog and cat. Cat sounds more like neow than meow. Mooooo sounds more like mmmmm. Whoof, whoof is actually hilarious to hear you say. It's like you are blowing air out of your mouth and you do it repeatedly. Whenever you see a dog, you start saying, "whew, whew, whew whew" very quickly and forcefully with a lot of excitement. Occasionally, you'll do this when you see a cat. I know, it gets confusing keeping up with all of the animals and their sounds!

You love being held. You are our cuddle bug and we love it. Right now, you are so busy that cuddle time may only last 5 seconds, but we take anything we can get. You also like to suck your thumb, your right thumb; however, you usually only suck your thumb whenever you are tired or upset. When you're upset, you suck your right thumb, grab your left sleeve with your right pinkie and/or your right sleeve with your left thumb, cross your feet at the ankles (right over left), and hunch over. Or, you just wail...loudly! You've never been one to have fake cries. You go from the depths of toddler despair to pure joy in seconds. There really isn't much of an in between.

So here are some things that you don't particularly like at 18 months: mommy or daddy brushing your teeth (self-brushing is fine although not very effective), having to stop doing something you're enjoying, and mommy or daddy looking at you too much while you are in your car seat.

The list of things you love is very long: You love to talk on the phone. Whenever you talk, you say, "Yah, yah, yah, yah." You love to drive the car (pretend drive), play with balls, roll balls downhill, listen to music, dance, open and close doors, play with keys in the door, vacuum, listen to the church bells chime and say, "Ding, ding, ding", slide down slides, swing at the park, pick up and throw rocks, scoop sand, climb up and down stairs, wash your hands, take a shower, dry your hair with the hairdryer, play with spice jars, empty drawers and cabinets, drop your food on the floor when you're finished or don't like it, play hide-n-seek, open things with zippers, and so much more!

There is one thing you love that deserves mentioning apart from all the others: when Daddy comes home each day. This is a very exciting time for both of us. Whenever you hear noise coming from another part of the house, you'll say to me, "Dadda!" Whenever it really is Daddy, you run to the front door, watch him walk through it, and shout out a very enthusiastic, "Hey!" You then want Daddy to hold you and take you to our room where you can sit on the bed and play with his hat, wallet, keys and phone while he changes his clothes. You love your daddy and the two of you play hard together.

Jackson, you have such a sweet spirit. Nothing illustrates it better than when you are playing and you look at me and say, "Thank You, Jesus" with a big smile on your face and hands clasped in prayer. Your sweetness also melts my heart whenever you give me and Daddy kisses and say, "Mmmmmm."

Tonight, Daddy and I were getting in bed and we saw your shorts lying on top of the covers. I picked them up to put them away and said to your Daddy, "Our little boy is so special." Daddy said that he was just about to say the exact same thing. Jackson, we are really enjoying our time with you and we are so grateful that we get to be your parents.

Jacker Jackers, Mommy loves you so much!

Happy Birthday, Jonathan!

At this point, Jason could potentially feel left out with my brother and both brother-in-laws birthdays in May! Thank goodness my dad's birthday is in August! Our family is so blessed with the men God has brought into it either by blood or marriage.

Jonathan is my big sister's husband of almost 9 years. Here's a photo of him holding his third son:

Jonathan,
Saturday birthdays don't come very often, so I hope you take full advantage of the day and really enjoy yourself! Of all of the in-laws, you've been around the longest...13 years, I think! You've known me since my teeny-bopper days (as my dad likes to call them), and you've known my unreformed and reformed heart. Amazingly, your care for me has remained constant even through all of my ups and downs, which is a testimony of your heart's loyalty to Christ.

The greatest gifts you have given me are loving Jesus Christ above all and loving my sister more than yourself. When Melissa was at a low in her life, you came along on your white horse, fully armored, and swept her off of her feet. Our family hasn't stopped thanking God since. You are a terrific husband, amazing father, and super caring brother/son-in-law. You are so patient, so kind, and so forgiving. You're so brilliant and yet able to have silly fun. Your three boys have a wonderful example of a godly man in their father!

Today, of all days, I hope you know how much you are appreciated and loved. You've known me for so long and have seen me through so much, that you feel like a big brother to me (something I always wanted). We love and miss you so much and can't wait to be together as a family. I am extremely excited for our boys to play together. I've been looking forward to the day for a while. Have a fantastic day and a yummy birthday cake! I wish we could be there to celebrate these May birthdays!

Our New Pets

We live in a very rural part of Germany. I love it not only because it is so beautiful, but because I feel that this Texas city girl has a lot to learn out here in this agricultural world. The majority of our house is surrounded by fields currently covered with wildflowers. (Why did I not live here when I had to do my high school wildflower project? I would have been set in my own backyard!) In the summer, the farmers in my village bring in cows to graze the fields. Last week, we got a few cows that aren't even 25 yards from our house! (And for those of you who are cow ignorant like me, no, they don't smell at all!) There are three milk cows, two babies, and one toddler cow (not a baby but not a man). When Jackson and I went over to see them, the two babies still has their umbilical cords attached!! I think they were two days old. Here's a photo of one of the babies. If you look really close, you might be able to see it!

Last Friday, Jackson and I were on our way home. I took a different street to get to our house so that Jackson could see the other cows that just came in. In the grass, by the side of the road and just outside of the fence, there was a brand new, seriously just born, calf! I was so worried as to how it got down there. It looked like it might have rolled down and under the fence once it was born. There was a lady standing out there, and I figured these were her cows and she'd know just what to do.

We went home and I put Jackson down for his nap. Once he woke up, we walked back over to check on the newborn calf. It was back in the field! A couple of minutes later, our neighbor came by on his huge tractor, which Jackson loves. He took the calf from the field, but it in this little tray-like thing that was at the front his tractor, and took it to the field next to our backyard. Now, I know that I know nothing about cows, but I hated watching him pick it up by its legs and carry it to the tractor. I just wanted to scoop it up and hold it like a baby. The poor calf pooped all over my neighbor's pants, the road, and the tray thing on the tractor. Then, my neighbor, Ervin, put tags in its ears. What trauma for a newborn! I know this is normal and less painful than branding (according to my mom), but I still hurt for it. (I keep calling the calf "it" because I'm not sure if it's a boy or a girl. I didn't look.)

I was really troubled as to why he was moving the calf. Since I don't speak German and he doesn't speak English, it was very hard for me to ask. I was able to understand that the calf's mother was not in the field I found it in nor in my field. It appears that its mother is in a third field. So why isn't it with its mother?!?!

I kept watching that sweet thing all afternoon. It was nursing from one of the cows in my field. I felt so terrible that it had been taken from its mother. I was hoping that my neighbor would come out so that I could ask if we could go pet it.

On Sunday, I looked for the calf in the field, but it's not there anymore. I don't know where it's gone. I told Jason that it probably died because it was distraught over being lost from its mother! I know this sounds ridiculous. After all, these are just cows. But I'm telling you it is so different when they are in your backyard like your pet. Here's a shot of the cows:

Do you know how badly I want to bathe this poor mama:

Jackson and I look at the cows every day. I think he's making the sign for cow, but it's hard to tell if he's signing cow or horse (thinking the horse sign applies to both). He does try to say, "Mooooo!" It's so cute.

We talk about animals a lot because there are so many around here. He hasn't said any of their names, but he does make the sounds of a cow, cat and dog. Cat sounds the best, but dog is the funniest. Whenever he sees a dog, he says, "Woof, woof!" but it sounds more like he's blowing air. It's hilarious! I love all of the exposure he's getting to the animals on a daily basis. It's so much better than only seeing them in pictures. He gets 3D pictures and gets to hear the real thing! Thank you, Jesus! What a blessing!

Happy Birthday Ryan!

Ryan,
I'm not even sure if Meredith gets to be with you today since you are in two different states for a couple of weeks; regardless, I hope you have a terrific birthday. I could not have dreamed of a better hubby for my baby sister. Ryan, I have seriously prayed for you for so long because I so desperately wanted a man for Mer who would love her for exactly who she is. You honestly do that better than any person I know and I could sing praises of thankfulness forever for that. You are brilliant and a strong leader for my very independent sister. Your wit is something that still surprises me and brings me much laughter. You are concerned for and serve others very unselfishly. I love that you lead Meredith to the Lord and that you have a pure heart for Him. You truly are an amazing person and I'm so blessed that you are a part of our family. Thank you for loving Christ, thank you for loving Meredith, and thank you for loving our family. These are the greatest gifts you have given us. We love you and can't wait to be reunited with all of you in September. We are looking forward to some fabulous family time! Happy Birthday, Ryan!

This is Ryan...doing what he really enjoys:

Happy Birthday Ronald!

Ronald,
I love birthdays. They make me focus on all of the things I appreciate about the birthday person...in this case, the birthday boy! I wish that we could celebrate the day with you, bake you a cake, and have tons of fun; nevertheless, we will be thinking of you all day and thanking God for making you just the way He did.

I couldn't ask for a better brother. You seriously are the superbest of the superbest! You are one of the very few people who actually understands this crazy mind of mine. I can talk to you about ANYTHING...something I am extremely thankful for. You have a wonderful way of explaining things and helping me sort through the confusion that often clutters my mind. You have a very sensitive heart (thanks, in part I believe, to three older sisters...smile) and really know how to make people feel loved. You are an excellent leader and know how to serve and respect those who willingly follow you. AND, you make me laugh so hard!!! You are so funny! I love that about you!

I see so many amazing gifts in you. I can see the wonderful works of the Lord in your life and am grateful for the heart He has given you. I thank and praise Him for giving you a heart that loves Him and longs to live for Him. I really admire you for working to focus your attention on His thoughts of you rather than the world's thoughts of you. That is so hard for most of us.

Ronald, I hope your day is fantastic. Jason and I love you so much and miss you every day. We can't wait to see you in September and I can't wait for you to get to be around Jackson. Have a super day and know how much you are loved!

A photo of Ronald and Jason last May (a year ago)...it's pretty characteristic of the two of them when they are together:

I haven't seen my brother since 20 August of last year, which is why I have no recent photos and why I miss him so much!

My Mother's Day Weekend

For Mother's Day, our trio spent a long three-day weekend on the beach in Belgium. It was fantastic! We found a bed and breakfast in Klemskerke, a sweet, small village that is only 5 km from the beach. Huyze-August, the B&B, is run by husband and wife, Jan and Marleen. They have two beautiful rooms and are excellent hosts. Marleen's father was a famous artist and their home is decorated with his original paintings. Here are some photos of their home and our room:

Each morning, they served us a lovely breakfast on their patio. We had fresh bread and croissants, homemade jam (rhubarb, plum and apple...YUM!), Belgian chocolate, fresh fruit, fresh squeezed orange juice, wonderful hot tea with milk, and eggs from their hen.

I don't think we've had this much sun exposure at one time in our entire marriage! We were in great need of some natural Vitamin D after our dark and long winter. For three days, we relaxed, played, and enjoyed each other's company. I have so many photos to share of our weekend.

Men at work:

We had so much fun scooping and pouring sand!

Jason showing Jackson the horseback riders. They were frequently running up and down the beach. The dark line in the front of the photo (the separation of wet and dry sand) is where the tide comes in by evening. I've never experienced this before. Our first day there, we were at the beach in the morning and the tide was out like it is in this photo. We left in the afternoon to give Jackson a nap. When we returned around six in the evening, the tide was all the way up. It was amazing! The next day, we watched the tide come in.

Discovering his feet sinking in the sand:

So, Jackson, do you think you're pretty good with a bow staff?

This German couple and little boy stayed in the B&B's other room. We had wonderful mealtime conversations discussing cultural differences and enjoyed wine and cheese at night. Killian, the little boy, and Jackson had so much fun playing together.

Every morning, we ate our wonderful breakfast on this patio, which overlooked the garden. The weather was glorious...perfect temperature and warm sunshine. Jason and I were able to enjoy our meal while Jackson played in between bites of croissants, yogurt, and fruit.

The sun was so bright on the beach and the wind was blowing fairly hard. We tried hard for a nice beach photo. Either the sun was in our face and our eyes were squinty or the wind was at our backs and my hair was covering my face. We opted for squinty eyes.

A passerby graciously took this photo of our family:

By six in the evening, this part of the beach is covered with water from the tide that comes in. The sand was very wet and Jackson loved scooping it up and throwing it.

While Jackson napped peacefully on the sand, we played catch with the football, had uninterrupted conversation, and tried for a good photo of just mom and dad. (Jason is really humoring me if you can't tell by his very enthusiastic smiles. Thanks Jace!)

Some white people in desperate need of some color:

This is the trail we walked to get to the beach on day two and three. It led to a more secluded area that wasn't crowded like the beaches at De Haan and Vosseslag, two nearby towns.

We ended our weekend strolling through De Haan and enjoying ice cream and Brussels waffles. We let Jackson have his very own cone, which was a first for him, and he thoroughly enjoyed the homemade strawberry along with a few bites of the cone. I think he felt like such a big boy!

"Daddy! Look at me!!!" (He was squealing at Jace in this photo. That boy LOVES his daddy!)

Two Great Mothers

This post is coming late because we were out of town over the weekend and didn't have internet access like we thought we would.

Happy Mother's Day to my Mom:

Mom, I have had the blessing of being mothered by one of the most unselfish mothers I know. It was not until I became a mom myself that I realized how much you gave to me, Melissa, Meredith and Ronald. Countless times, I find myself saying, "How did she do it? Why can't I do it? I wish I could be as unselfish and untiring as she was. How did she make it with a newborn, 2, 4 and 6-year old? If she could do it with four, then why can't I with just one!?"

I'm sure you didn't always feel like a champion, but I never noticed. And if things were left undone, I really don't remember. The things I remember are the countless hours you spent talking to me, the breakfasts and lunches you made EVERY school day, the time and energy you put into helping me with school projects and drill team costumes, the friends of mine that you treated as one of your own, the love that you equally gave to the four of us, and the security you provided in loving our dad more than anyone.

Since I've been married and have now had a baby of my own, I appreciate you on a whole new level. You have been an amazing example of how to serve my husband and love my child. I can't imagine Jackson's birth day without you there. Those moments with my firstborn and my mother are forever engraved in my mind...first feedings, first holds, first diapers. I will also never forget the floors that you cleaned, the clothes you laundered, the meals you made, and the comfort your presence provided.

As I tuck my child into bed to sleep and say prayers over him, I can't help but think of all of those nights that you knelt by my bedside in prayer and conversation. (I also remember plenty of, "Girls, stop talking and go to sleep!") Mom, conversation is one of the greatest gifts you ever gave me. You recognized that I had a huge need for it!

Another one of the greatest things you ever taught me is forgiveness and not holding a grudge. I can't tell you how freeing it has been to be able to let go and love others in spite of what they may do to me. You were an amazing example of that and I thank you so much.

I wish that we could have spent this Mother's Day together. I miss you so much and my heart aches to see you and share life with you. Not being able to share my recent mothering experiences is so painful at times, but I rejoice over the provision of phone calls, email, and blogs! They keep us close when we are so far.

I love you, Mom, and hope that your Mother's Day was a blessing. You have done the greatest job on earth and I am forever grateful for it. Thank you for staying home with us throughout our entire childhood rather than running after personal success, riches, and status. I love you forever!

My mom and me with Jackson on his birth day:

Happy Mother's Day to the Mom I gained:

Mom, not many people can call their mother-in-law mom. I'm so blessed that I can! Can you believe it's been 9 years that we've been celebrating this day together as mother and daughter-in-law?! I wish that we could have celebrated together today.

You are a terrific mom who has given your entire life for your children. Becoming a mom myself is continually showing me the measure of sacrifice that you made in raising your four children. And ironically, our early years have been similar with frequent moves, moving with babies, and living far from family. I have gained a new respect for you (and my own mom) as I see how challenging (yet very rewarding) motherhood can be.

I want to thank you today for all of the encouragement you have given me since becoming a mom. You have never made me feel inadequate, you seem to calm some of the new mother anxieties I have by helping me keep my eye on the big picture. I only wish that we could be nearer as I walk this road of motherhood and you walk the one of grand-motherhood!

I know that moms don't always get the appreciation they deserve. Well, I hope my words can convey the appreciation I have for all that you've done for your family and the recognition that I have for the many things you do that go unnoticed or without thanks.

I don't know if you realize it, but you have given your children a lot of traditions that they've carried with them into adulthood. It's been fun to learn from Jason some of the things that you did for your children and that we will now do for ours.

Thank you for making me a part of your family. I hope that we can live closer one day to enjoy our lives more fully. You are such a sweet and giving person. I want Jackson to know you closely and benefit from a relationship with you. I love you so much!!!

This is an old photo (I'm 37 weeks pregnant and Megan normally has blonde hair) but it's the only one I had on my computer. From left to right: me, Megan, Mom, and Jessica

Thank You, Jesus

I'm exhausted from uploading photos for my last three posts, but I have to document one of the most exciting "firsts" of Jackson. It actually occurred on Saturday, 25 April but has happened several times since. Jason was at work and Jackson and I were at home eating breakfast. I served Jackson and then asked him to tell Jesus thank You for his food. I've never asked him to say that before. Usually, we just hold hands and I pray (or Jason does when he's at home). Jackson clasped his hands together in prayer and with a huge smile on his face said, "Thank You, Jesus!" I couldn't believe it!

He's said it several times since whenever we're preparing to eat. Tonight, after Jason finished praying for our family and kissed Jackson goodnight, Jackson looked up, clasped his hands together, and said, "Thank You, Jesus!" with a sweet smile on his face. Our hearts just melted!

Oh Lord, I praise you for moments like these and pray for the salvation of that sweet boy.

Noordwijk Beach, The Netherlands

We decided to leave Keukenhof earlier than planned and head to the beach for a few hours. This was a completely spontaneous decision that I am SO glad we made! It was wonderful. We hadn't been on the beach 5 minutes when Jason said, "Now, I understand why my parents took us to the beach so often when we were kids." It was so relaxing and restful.

Jackson was totally at peace. He is normally a chatterbox, but he didn't say anything. He just sat in the sand digging and filling his cup, which we happened to have in the car along with an ice scraper that made a decent shovel. After our busy itinerary in Amsterdam, this was a nice change of pace that we all loved.

My boys! I love these two pictures:

Two ladies passed by with a dog that Jackson was very interested in. However, you can't tell in this picture because he's busy smiling at them. They asked if we'd like a photo of the dog.

So I took a few of the dog and then asked if they'd take one of the three of us. Yeah for family photos! They rarely happen.

We stayed on the beach for about two hours and then headed to the car to go get dinner and make the drive home. I was changing Jackson's diaper in the front seat when he escaped and jumped into the driver's seat. This is one of his favorite things to do...thanks to Jason trying to pass the time in the April snow (driving permit...hmmmm).

The only windmill photo I got...taken from the car on our way home:

We loved the beach so much, that we've decided to go back this weekend! We're actually going to the Belgium coast because it's a holiday here and everything was booked that was within our price range (we're budget travelers). I'm really looking forward to having a relaxing vacation over Mother's Day weekend.